Walking in Love

For me, walking in love means so many things right now.
1. Obviously, I'm busy with loving my sweet family -- Willow Grace as she recovers in this hospital bed, and my husband Chris as we walk this road together.
2. I've had to choose to walk in love and forgive the doctor who almost sent us home from the ER on Wednesday, a decision that would have had harsh consequences.
3. I'm overwhelmed at the love others are showing me through this whole process. I am truly walking around bathed in the love being poured into my life through prayers, gifts, visits, and words of encouragement.
4. And, as I journey through this trial, I feel the love of my Heavenly Father washing over me every step of the way.

From about 1:30 this morning until our first guests arrived, I sat in the sturdy Cracker Barrel rocking chair beside Willow Grace's hospital bed praying and watching her looking dazed and confused. As a steady stream of visitors (21 in all) wandered in and out of our little room, she was either staring off into space or sleeping. I hoped all day for more response from her, and yet she remained mostly quiet and still. This is totally normal after all that she's been through, but my mother's heart could not help but hope to hear my little girl's voice sweetly chirping my name or to see even the hint of a smile.

The good news: The nephrologist (kidney specialist) who is taking care of Willow Grace said that she is doing better than expected and that the dialysis is progressing a bit faster than expected. She is now in her 28th hour on the dialysis machine, and there have been no complications. At this point, she will be on the machine indefinitely. Though she had to have a transfusion when her red blood count dropped to 20 last night, she did well with the transfusion. She was finally able to get more nourishment tonight when they switched her to a TPN, a bag of nutrients given through her picc line which includes electrolytes, protein, carbohydrates, and sugar.

Other tidbits: For those of you who have asked, you cannot treat HUS with antibiotics. It actually feeds the bacteria and causes it to grow. As to how long we'll be here, the doctor told us that it would be another 2-6 weeks. The last two patients who were recently treated with this here were released after 4 and 6 weeks. I am praying that we will be home by Christmas! Willow Grace is not allowed to be around children under the age of 5 for at least two more weeks because HUS is very contagious for children but does not affect adults.

Since she hasn't been sleeping much at night, Chris and I have been sleeping in shifts, reluctant to leave her awake in the middle of the night alone. I get the first shift. Below is the scripture I am meditating on tonight as I lay my head down to rest. I hope that it encourages you as much as it does me.

Psalm 37:3-7a (New King James Version)
3 Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. 4 Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.5 Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. 6 He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. 7 Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him....