Over-share

I remember a time when I felt that my thoughts were so private. I fiercely guarded my secrets. Some I still do. But lately, hardly a day goes by when I don’t berate myself for over-sharing. When did that start happening?

I’m really hard on myself. Ask my husband. Ask my mom. Really, I should cut myself some slack, lay off a bit. I know the things that I’ve raked myself over the coals about my entire life. Over-sharing was never a problem. Until recently.

I blame Facebook.

No, really, I do. I am one of those people who checks in a few times a day and actually enjoys other people’s mundane reports on what they’re doing. However, often I find that there are plenty of people who seem to be having the most glorious day of their lives and know just how to turn a phrase when briefly describing their latest undertaking, even if all they’re doing is hanging out with family or running an errand. Adventure seems to pursue them on every wind.

And, yes, I do it, too. I think my life is beautiful and funny and crazy and, well, LIFE. And it’s fun to report the little amusing anecdotes and oddities and even the little things that are so blandly normal that just make me feel human. It’s even nice to be able to put a “have you ever” moment out there and receive a half a dozen responses indicating that you’re not the only one to have gone through something so hard or tragic or just weird.

Yet still, somewhere in there, I began to notice myself over-sharing. And not just on Facebook; it bled into my everyday life – standing at the coffee maker at work just waiting for that last drip so I can grab a mugful and hurry back to my to-do list and I babble to a passing acquaintance a little too much about my recent struggle with… whatever. Sometimes I feel like I’m talking in status updates.

But, Facebook isn’t the only problem.

I have a theory that some of this over-sharing also started when I stopped writing… and I mean really writing. I used to write all the time – journals, blogs, plays, short stories, attempts at a book or two, and so on. A few years ago, I stopped writing in my journal, something I had previously done since the age of 12. I also stopped writing here. I’m naturally a communicative person. I love to talk. Once again, just ask my husband or my mom. However, for most of my life, a lot of my communication came out in the form of writing. And I just stopped. All those excess thoughts, feelings, opinions, dreams, ideas, stories, ponderings, and just words had to come out somewhere. If you were the “somewhere” it got spilled (and sometimes spewed), I’m sorry.

My solution: I must write. And so, write I will. Here. There. And everywhere.

Fresh Perspective and Resolutions

This morning I stood just outside my mom's storm door watching Willow Grace wave to me and blow me kisses. After every summer, Christmas break, and spring break I have a hard time leaving her once again, and this morning I felt that familiar twinge, that wrenching feeling tugging at my heart. And yet, as I peered back through the glass and skipped off towards my little car, I couldn't help but smile. The fact that I was leaving her meant that she is well enough for me to return to work. She is well and getting healthier every day. I am overwhelmed with gratitude.

In the last couple days I've heard several stories about other parents who have recently lost their children - to illness, accidents, and suicide. One of those families has a story similar to ours. They took their young daughter to the emergency room a couple weeks ago, and just like us they were encouraged to take her home. We were blessed to have an amazing nurse who was a strong advocate for us and enabled us to stay at the hospital, which was good because it wasn't until the next day that we found out how serious Willow Grace's condition was. This other family, they took their little girl home, and just a few days before Christmas she died. My heart grieves for that mother and father and for all those who love that little girl. As I go to sleep each night, I pray for them. In the middle of the night, I wake up praying for them, and I do the same when I wake in the morning. This could have so easily been us, and I am so very grateful that at this moment my dear girl is sleeping peacefully in her own bed just down the hall.

All of these stories have reminded me of what a great war we wage each day. This isn't all just happenstance; we have a real enemy who daily seeks to wreck our lives, ripping apart our families and stealing our peace in any way he can. "The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." (John 10:10 NKJV) We have to fight for each other. We have to fight for our children, our families, and others who do not yet know how to fight for themselves. The first and most important step in this is faith-filled prayer. It's the most powerful weapon we have. I'm committing myself to pray more for others this year than I ever have.

One other thing I've decided to do is start writing again in my grateful journal. I used to be quite faithful in writing down 3-5 things each day for which I was grateful, but somewhere along the line in the last few years I seriously started slacking in that department. I really want to live in gratitude, constantly aware of how God has blessed my life, and so, at least a few times a week I plan to jot down a few of those blessings.

Here's what I'll be adding tonight:
1. Shared a delicious breakfast at Lovelace Cafe with 130+ co-workers and some of my dearest friends this morning
2. Had a great conversation on the phone with a sweet friend whom I haven't been able to talk to in quite while
3. Woke early this morning and had good devotional time with my Savior
4. Was able to start working out again this morning. Love Pilates!
5. Had a fun trip to the grocery store with Willow Grace and enjoyed "oohing" and "ahhing" at the last of the Christmas light displays with her on the way home

Odds & Ends (and a Peaceful New Year)

It's been a few days since my last post, twelve to be exact. However, I've been wrapping myself up in a cozy quilt of home, family, and Christmas. Sitting in front of a roaring fire that my husband has lovingly built and watching Willow Grace play happily with her new toys in front of the Christmas tree while I tackle a few dozen thank you notes has taken most all the extra time I've had, not that I've had much.

It turns out that Willow Grace has needed almost as much tending to out of the hospital as she did in. While most people might see Willow Grace and think that she looks close to normal, there are things a mother's eye do not miss. The pale shade of her cheek, the faint dark circles under her eyes, the lack of luster in her hair, the tendency to whine -- these all do not belong to my daughter. She's also been getting up between two and four o'clock every morning and staying up. We both are in desperate need of more sleep. Never has she been so clingy or so quick to cry. Since she was a newborn she was low-maintenance and seemed to have a near perfect balance of dependence and independence. However, that seems to have changed a bit since she became ill. The doctor assures me that this is quite common in recovering from HUS and an extended hospital stay and all will be back to normal in a few weeks. I had to take her back to the doctor last week. She was looking quite ghost-like, was coughing incessantly, and often threw up whenever she coughed too hard or cried too hard. It turns out that it's just a really nasty cold made worse by her compromised immune system. The doctor said it would be another couple weeks before her immune system is strong enough to fight off much, and so we've decided to keep her out of school for at least a week and maybe two.

Both Chris and I ended up at the walk-in clinic yesterday morning. It was kind of weird to be seen as a couple, but since we had basically the same symptoms, I guess they thought they'd "kill two birds with one stone" (the birds being the illnesses and not us). We had already sent Willow Grace to stay with his parents on New Year's Eve to help protect her from whatever was going on with us; she certainly didn't need anything more to deal with. It turns out that both of us were diagnosed with sinusitis, and I had also developed bronchitis. A pair of steroid shots and a couple of z-packs later, and we were good to good to go!

Upon arriving home from the hospital a couple weeks ago, I've been busily trying to get the house into some sort of organized state, a battle that I feel starts fresh every morning, complicated somewhat by tending to a recovering daughter and then falling ill myself. Of course I won't be taking down my tree until next Saturday. The twelve days of Christmas ends on Wednesday, and Saturday will be my first chance to tend to that task. That's fine by me; we were so late in getting it up. I really don't mind enjoying it a little while longer. However, perhaps after all the holiday trimmings are put away things will start to fall into place a little easier.

A new year. And so we begin again. The new semester starts tomorrow, and I am truly looking forward to being back with my colleagues and friends and to getting back into a normal schedule. This year, I am a full-time substitute, which keeps me quite busy but generally spares me taking grading or other work home. For the first month back to school, however, I'll be teaching eighth grade science. Yes, eighth grade science for a month! I'm a little nervous about this, especially since my natural talents tend to be in the humanities and not in the areas of math and science. However, I relish a challenge, and I am sure that I can meet this one. In the realm of new beginnings, I also haven't worked out since before Willow Grace fell ill, and so my plan is to start that back up again tomorrow. Yes, I know I've been ill and out of practice; don't worry. I'll start out slow. I think I'll kick it off with some Pilates and light jogging this week to get myself loosened up and ready for something more strenuous by next week.

One final note: This morning, I was listening to a preacher who said that Christmas was about reconciliation and peace, not between men and each other but between men and God. When the angels said, "Peace on earth," they meant between men and God. Either I had never thought of it that way before or it never really struck me as it did this morning. I had sometimes wondered why there wasn't more peace between men. In discussing this with Chris, he said, "Of course, there will never be peace between men.... A man must have peace with God before he can have peace with men." And so, this year, my wish, my prayer, for you, my dear friends, is that you may have peace in your home, with your family, and with all those you come into contact but most of all with Jesus Christ.

Expectations

This snowy Monday morning finds Chris, Willow Grace, and me lounging in the living room. A blazing fire is merrily crackling away in the hearth, and Willow Grace has spent the last hour giggling incessantly for a dozen silly reasons causing us to join in with her without really knowing why. Perhaps it's just that we're all so happy to be here in our cozy home instead of still being couped up in that little hospital room.

We're slowly, very slowly, settling back into our life here, and I am trying to allow myself to rest without feeling guilty about it. Our 18 days in the hospital left me feeling quite exhausted. I know that I said to myself and others that I knew it would be a process, that I would have to readjust to life outside the hospital, and that it would take a some time for Willow Grace to finish her recovery and build back up her strength. I said it, and I believed it. Really, I did. And yet, it's an entirely different thing to live it. And so now I am continuing to employ patience, mostly with myself. I tend to be pretty hard on myself and hold myself to high expectations, sometimes unrealistically so. I don't have all the things we accumulated at the hospital organized and put away, and I haven't put away all of the autumn decorations that were still out waiting for the Thanksgiving we never got to have. There's so much to be done. I suppose it's time to cut myself a little bit of slack. It will all get accomplished, just not on the time table I had set up in my head.

Our first night home, Saturday night, I think that we were all just so grateful to be here that we practically melted into the furniture when we arrived. Willow Grace immediately started playing with her toys, but when she sat down on the floor she needed help getting back up. Later, when she tried to climb the steps to go to her room, she could only make it up one step! The last two nights, I tried to put her to sleep in her own bed, but at some point I ended up running, half-asleep to her side when she shrilly screamed out, "Mommy!" And inevitably, she has ended up in our bed. (Interestingly enough, she only calls me Mommy when she's sick, scared, or has some other problem she can't solve herself. Otherwise, it's Mama or Ariel.)Yesterday and today, she has gained back a tad more strength, and her appetite seems to be increasing as well. I so wish that I could take her out in this glorious snow. She loves it so much and wants so badly to build a snowman. So far, however, she has been content to look out the window at the snow. What's important is that she is on the mend, and we will get to enjoy our Christmas break with family and here in our little home. And I'm just going to pray for more snow this winter season for us to enjoy!

Willow Grace Wednesday

Since I haven't done a Willow Grace Wednesday in a while, I have a couple hundred pictures to choose from. Such a difficult job. So I thought I'd focus on a couple with Chris and a couple with me.

The two below were taken at the aquarium in Chattanooga. Such an amazing day for the three of us. Willow Grace LOVED the fish and made sure everyone around us knew it!

Here Willow Grace and I are hanging out in the backyard at my parents' house. I love that she's looking at me in this pic. So sweet! And what a cool couple of girls in their shades, right?

I'll post more pictures soon. Maybe I'll do a separate post with pics from her 2nd birthday. Ah, we'll see.

Happy Wednesday everyone!

Willow Grace Wednesday

(Two little princesses! Willow Grace and her 2nd cousin Madison playing dress up at my parents' house. Don't they look sweet?)

(She's hanging out with her daddy on the hearth at his parents house, already in her pj's because we knew she'd be asleep by the time we arrived home. And of course she was!)

(In the car with Leroy the zebra whom we picked up at the zoo last Friday and her Curious George. The girl seriously loves stuffed animals.)

(In her room watching her current favorite movie, The Adventures of Winnie the Pooh. She loves hanging out on this love bug. She's constantly dragging books off her shelf and sitting there to read them. I know the cups look weird, but for some reason she wanted to hold them. )

The Nashville Zoo

Chris and I went to the zoo a year ago with Willow Grace, and she loved it then. Her favorite thing at 11 months old was the elephants which she kept calling "dog" or "Bella" like our massive Great Pyranees/Lab. On that visit, we bought her a little stuffed elephant whom we call Ralph, and she has loved Ralph well this last year.

I was anxious to see how she would react at 23 months, and she did not disappoint. Even as we approached the gates, she was trembling with joy and saying, "I go see the animals!"

This time she walked for most of the time there and absolutely loved seeing all the animals. This year's favorite? The zebra. She had been talking about zebras for days, so I knew she would be giddy about seeing them. She giggled and pointed and tried talking to them. And, of course, to commemorate our trip, we bought her a little stuffed zebra whom we've named Leroy. She loves Leroy!

I didn't take any cool pics of the animals this year, just a few of us and Willow Grace. We have a little video we shot which I hope to post soon.

A perfect summer day?

Yep, I think that's pretty much what yesterday added up to.

Sleeping in just a little, painting Willow Grace's toe nails dark pink while she ate breakfast, Mom coming to spend the day with me and Willow Grace, free kids movie at the Regal theater, watching Willow Grace play with another little girl in the lobby of the theater, lunch at O'Charley's with a celebrity siting of Kenny Chesney, shopping, afternoon swimming, and then when Chris came home from work watching Willow Grace fall asleep in his arms while trying to eat a Bugle, enjoying the classic summer meal of grilled burgers and chips for dinner, waking Willow Grace to feed her dinner and then watch her play in her bath tub before bathing her and rocking her to sleep. Full day. Great day.

I love summer!

And today, it's back to work, but I'll have the next six days off, so I'm good!

My Husband Rocks!

3x5 – A little snapshot of Chris

3 categories
5 things for each category
A glimpse of how wonderful Chris really is

5 ways he rocked this week:

1. Gave me a foot massage
2. Washed the dishes several times.
3. Put Willow Grace to bed.
4. Helped me get everything together each morning to get out the door with Willow Grace
5. How he appreciated things I did like cooking or doing the laundry

5 things he does so much better than I do:

1. Making sweet tea
2. Building fires
3. Fixing things around the house
4. Working on computers
5. Listening

5 things I love about him:

1. The way he looks – his hair, his smile, his eyes….
2. How wonderfully silly he can be
3. The sound of his voice – either talking or singing
4. His creativity and storytelling
5. His intelligence and his logical way of looking at things

(looking dapper the day we wed)

My Husband Rocks!

“To love all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one…. Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglement; lock it in a safe casket or coffin of selfishness. But in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable…. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all dangers of love is – –Hell.” (C.S. Lewis)

Marriage is not easy. It’s not for the faint of heart. It takes real work and determination. There is no autopilot. On those days when I lose sight of the bliss, of the blessing, that God has given me in my marriage, I’m tempted to abandon myself to the business of life, to stop trusting (both in my husband and God), and to carefully lock my heart away – just like C.S. Lewis talked about in the above quote. Yes, I am tempted, but I refuse to give in or to give up.

I am committed to being vulnerable and submitting my heart to be broken. Love is worth it. My marriage is worth it. My rockin’ husband is worth it.

This week Katy Lin over at the great adventure gave us the prompt, “Tell us about a time that your spouse went out of his way to serve you and love you sacrificially.”

Really, I could literally recount hundreds of times that Chris has put his own interests aside and scrounged up the energy or the will to do something for me. It’s in the little things that he does for me every day – cleaning the kitchen, putting the baby to bed, building me a fire, warming up my car on chilly mornings, getting up early to help me get out the door with the baby, always asking me what he can do to help me…. The list could go on and on. The cool thing is that I know it’s not just because he’s a nice guy. Really, I wouldn’t characterize him as a “nice guy;” nice guys don’t seem very strong to me. Chris IS strong. I guess I would say he’s a big tough guy with a tender heart. Really, the truest motivation behind those acts of kindness is because he really does love our daughter and me. That kind of love means that he really does rock!

Willow Grace Wednesday

Yeah, so I'm late on posting again! I meant to do it last night, but Chris came home with a raging headache, and I just spent my time taking care of him and Willow Grace.

Here's a few pics from our time in Gatlinburg this last weekend.

We lounged on the bed each night while we read our books. I love reading to her every night, and she loves books!
Just so you know, she's not all smiles all the time ... just most of the time. I can't help it; I think she's cute even when she's sad.
She just needed a little Daddy attention!

I wish you could see the snow falling. Just before we left it started to snow. Since it was just the three of us, Chris took this picture himself of our little happy family.

I have a cute little story from last night. Chris went upstairs to rest, and I stayed down playing with Willow Grace, cleaning up the kitchen, and tending to a few other chores. I also had American Idol on. During the commercials I was busy in the kitchen, and Willow Grace wanted to be right with me. As soon I heard the intro music after each commercial, I would say, "It's back on," and head back to the living room. Willow Grace would stop whatever she was doing, yell "Back on!" and chase after me. We sat on the couch together watching, and she was completely enraptured. Such a cutie!

Weekend Getaway

Chris, Willow Grace, and I spent a restful weekend in Gatlinburg. Since most of the pics we took were of Willow Grace, I'm going to post them tomorrow.

One of the best things about the weekend was the lack of agenda. We didn't really want to do anything but relax and spend time together. We only left our villa a couple times and not for very long. For most of our time there we kept the fire lit and spent our time hanging out in the living room. We viewed about a half dozen movies, played with Willow Grace, took an indulgently long and restful afternoon nap on Sunday, fiddled around on the computer, and just hung out. We only ate out once, taking breakfast Sunday morning at the Log Cabin Pancake House across the street from the resort; the rest of our meals were cooked in our villa. All in all, it was a nice weekend, and I'm sorry that we had to leave so soon. I'm looking forward to the day that we can spend a whole week there.

A Brief Glimpse of Home Life

Yesterday neither Chris nor I felt very well. I had been up most of the night, only getting about 2-3 hours of sleep. So, we played hooky from church and just lounged around all day in our pj’s in front of the TV and a lovely fire Chris built for us. Finally, as evening drew near and our feelings of ill health declined, we decided (and by we I mean me ☺) that we had to do a few things to get the house in order before the work week started. I busied myself with vacuuming, making dinner, and tending to the laundry. Chris straightened the living room and cleaned up the kitchen after dinner. After dinner, I was folding and putting away Willow Grace’s clothes when I heard her distinct hysterical giggles coming from the living room downstairs. To my surprise I also heard the classic Wham song “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go.” Apparently Willow Grace LOVED the song and danced her little heart out with her daddy! I’m sorry I missed seeing it, but I have to tell you that listening to them was priceless!

My Husband Rocks! Friday

This week I’m using the prompt from Katy Lin’s blog the great adventure to brag on my fabulous husband. It’s a questionnaire about our husbands. Katy Lin is the genius that started My Husband Rocks Friday! Check out her blog!

1. Where did you meet?
He was my neighbor. He lived downstairs in my apartment building.

2. How long did you date b/f you were married?
We dated for a year and a seven months before we were married. We were engaged for six of those months.

3. What does he do that surprises you?
Sometimes he brings me flowers “just because.” He’s also walks very quietly and often, without meaning to, sneaks up on me and just about makes me jump out of my skin!

4. What is your favorite quality of his?
He is so generous, always willing to help anyone out.

5. What is your favorite feature of his?
I absolutely love his eyes; it’s amazing how much he communicates through them. He also has really nice hair. ☺

6. Does he have a nickname for you?
He calls me “Kay-Kay” just like the rest of my family, but my favorite endearing nickname that he uses for me is “Angel.” I absolutely love it when he calls me that!

7. What is his favorite food?
He loves Chinese and has told me that he would eat it every day if I let him.

8. What is his favorite sport?
He’s not really a sports fanatic, but he does enjoy watching the Titans games with me.

9. When and where was your first kiss?
I don’t remember the exact date. Can you believe that? However, I do remember that we were sitting on the couch in his apartment.

10. What do you like to do together?
Everything! We love taking drives and walks together, listening to audio books, watching movies, and just hanging out. I really did marry my best friend!

11. Do you have any children?
He have one sweet little girl, Willow Grace.

12. Does he have a hidden talent?
He can sing. I love when he sings and wish that he did it more. I also wish that he’d play his guitar more. He’s also a talented writer. I fell in love with him because when we were still just friends he would tell me amazing stories.

13. Who said "I love you" first?
He did; I would never say it first. We were on one of our many drives on the Natchez Trace.

14. What is his favorite type of music?
He mostly listens to country and jazz, but he enjoys most types of music.

15. What do you admire most about him?
I think this is closely related to the “favorite quality” question, but I’ll pick another quality. He is really devoted to his family, not just me and Willow Grace but his entire family. He really would do anything for them.

16. Do you think he will read this?
Of course, he always reads my blog.☺

My Husband Rocks! Friday

This Sunday will be the fifth anniversary of our first date. I remember exactly what I was wearing; I know I blushed when he told me how pretty he thought I looked. There was a chill in the night air, and so even though the lobby was packed tight we wedged ourselves into a corner to wait for a table at PF Changs. He held my hand, and I could feel the tension in his stance, like he was clearly declaring to others that I was off limits. After dinner, we thoroughly enjoyed browsing around the Borders bookstore next door and reveling in our mutual love of books.

We had been friends for three years and seemed to just stumble into falling for one another. It was later that we started to see God's hand in all of it.



This is us just four months after we started dating. We were out for one of our many leisurely drives on the Natchez Trace. We had NO idea what we were in for, but the ride certainly has been worth it. I'm so proud to call myself Chris's wife. I am so blessed to raise a child with him. And I'm looking forward to the next five (and the next fifty) years with him.

I love you, my Chris!

My Husband Rocks! Friday

Very simply.... He helped to make this a great Christmas. He loves me and Willow Grace so well. He's funny and fun and silly and even serious when he needs to be. I love my Chris!

To learn more about my husband rocks! Friday and/or to join us in bragging on our husbands, check out Katy Lin's blog the great adventure.

Bad, bad blogger!

I have just been lazy on the blogging front. I even missed bragging on my husband this last Friday for My Husband Rocks! Friday. I've been busy getting ready for Christmas, spending tiem with my sweet Willow Grace, and trying desperately to bring some order to my house. Ialso just joined FaceBook this last week, and that's been eating up all my computer time. I promise to do better. Tomorrow I'll post some cute pics of Willow Grace. We never found the battery charger for our camera and had to buy another one! Erg! That's just not something you want to spend money on at Christmas, but I guess it just had to be done. Oh, well.

Merry Christmas!

My Husband Rocks! Friday

To join us in encouraging our spouses, check out Katy Lin's blog the great adventure. She's the mastermind behind this cool meme!

We had my parents over for dinner on Tuesday night. I made a big pot hearty vegetable beef soup, toasted a couple of baguettes in the oven, and served warm brownies with ice cream for dessert. Here’s the part where my husband rocks. While I got dinner on the table, Chris fed Willow Grace, played with her while I tidied up after, dressed her for bed, read her books, sang to her, and rocked her to sleep. When he came back downstairs, he finished cleaning up the kitchen for me while I visited with my parents, and then after they left he took my car to the gas station to fill it up for me. Doesn’t it all seem too good to be true? He really is that wonderful! His response would be,” I’m just me.” Well, he just rocks!

I wish that you could have seen Chris with Willow Grace. They were playing on the floor in front of the Christmas tree, and he was making her laugh hysterically. (Who doesn’t love hearing a baby cackle?) Once she let out a particularly delightful peal of giggles and said, “Oh, Daddy!” Precious! In between each bout of laughter, she would notice her Nana, Papa, and me watching from the dining room and pause to wave at us. So sweet!

This morning I got an extra couple of hours with my sweet husband and baby girl since the school where I work got a late opening due to snow. I hope your morning was as good as mine.

Merry Christmas!

My Husband Rocks! Friday

Katy Lin at the great adventure gave us a prompt this week for My Husband Rocks! Friday. We can choose whether or not we want to use it – no pressure. I thought that it sounded like a good idea.

Here’s the prompt:
“How did you meet your spouse? What initially attracted you to your spouse? How does that personality trait or physical characteristic affect you today? What is the same? What has changed?”

THE STORY OF US
In 2001, Chris and I became neighbors. He moved in downstairs from me in our apartment building. For a while it was just a simple greeting when we happened to see each other in the parking lot or stairway. However, one bright summer morning, my sister Eva and I were hanging out on my balcony when he came home from the night shift. I asked, “Hey, do you want a candy cane?” He eyed me suspiciously and said, “But it’s July….” “I know,” I replied. “I always have candy canes!” He agreed to take one, and we ended up talking for quite a while – him standing on the sidewalk and me leaning over the railing of the balcony. For the next couple years we developed a friendship – playing cards and board games, hanging out in each other’s apartments with our roommates, having dinner together, going for long drives down the Natchez Trace and all around Nashville, hiking in the park, and blasting through snow drifts in the mall parking lot the winter we had a freak snowstorm.

It’s still a bit of a mystery to me how it all happened. I wasn’t interested in him at all romantically, so I can’t really point to a quality that attracted me to him. However, one night, we were driving around talking about things we had gone through in our lives, and he reached over to hold my hand. It wasn’t something he even planned; it just happened. I thought, “ Well, this is new. It’s strange but OK.” Really, I thought it was more of a comfort thing than a romantic thing. Nothing was said about it, and it didn’t happen again for a bit. Slowly, we started getting closer, and one night I was getting ready to go down to his apartment to see him and realized that I was actually giddy! I couldn’t wait to see him. I told myself that I was just happy to be hanging out with my friend.

Our first official date was January 4, 2004. I had received a gift card to PF Changs for Christmas from one of my students, and so Chris and I went out to dinner. I don’t think it really started out as a date, but the way we held hands that night coupled with the way he looked at me changed everything. Three months later, on March 13, on yet another one of our drives on the Natchez Trace, Chris whipped into one of the small parking lots and told me he loved me. I laughed. He was confused. But I was just so happy; I couldn’t help it. And yes, I did finally stop laughing and tell him that I loved him too. (the summer after we started dating)

Just over a year later, on a gorgeous spring day in April, on a beautiful overlook, Chris surprised me by dropping to one knee and asking me to be his wife. (the only pic we have from the day we got engaged taken with the webcam)

We married on August 5, 2005, five months earlier than my original plan; we just couldn’t’ wait to begin our married life together.
Honestly, I am constantly in awe of the joy that being married to Chris has brought me. Just yesterday morning I told him that I am still mystified by the fact that we are married and that we have such a beautiful baby girl. I never imagined that I could be loved the way he loves me – so completely and unconditionally. I am still giddily in love with him and get excited about seeing him at the end of every day.

Willow Grace Wednesday

Our sweet, fun-loving, cheerful, bouncy girl is back! We are so thrilled that she's not sick anymore; it was just too sad watching her lounge around and not being able to smile. Chris certainly has enjoyed playtime with her. These pictures were taken on Sunday while I busied myself with Christmas decorations. Chris was busy himself - with entertaining the baby. There's nothing like Daddy-daughter time!